Title: The “Something’s Off” Mom
Physical characteristics: Well put together. Appears organized, coiffed, calm. Children are well-behaved, well-groomed and well-dressed.
Qualities: Smiles sweetly. Not very chatty. Drives a mini-van with a curiously inappropriate bumper sticker, that reads something like, “Back off or I’ll flick boogers on your windhsield!” or “If you’re going to ride my ass, at least pull my hair!” One fashion element per day that is baffling and not at all in keeping with her otherwise well-kept appearance – examples: a hair snood, orange lipstick.
Pros: Really fun to see what fashion choice she will make each day.
Cons: Ten minutes of valuable sing-along-with-the radio-on-the-way-to-the-office time spent quietly pondering 1) what exactly she was thinking when she got dressed and ready in the morning and 2) where she buys her lipstick.