Leisure Time

Once a year my husband heads to Maine on a Friday morning with all three kids. This means that when I get home from work on Friday night, I get the house all to myself for a glorious 12-14 hours.  Sure, I’ll be sleeping for 7-8 of those hours but the other 5 or 6 hours?  I can do whatever I want!  And those sleeping hours?  They will be uninterrupted! (Except maybe by the confused cat, wondering where the rest of her noisy family is.) And the waking hours?  No one asking for anything (except maybe the hungry cat)! No one needing dressing, changing, wiping, feeding or any of my attention!  OH HAPPY DAY!

 

My mind spins with all of the possibilities!  I will make a plan!

THE PLAN:

I will…

… go to Target on the way home, or maybe Whole Foods, or maybe Trader Joe’s!  I never go to Trader Joe’s! I will get their margarita mix!  And some onion bhajis!  And croissants! And flowers!  And mango babka!

Image from Trader Joe's. Click on photo to go there!

Image from Trader Joe’s. Click on photo to go there!

… swing by Starbucks for an iced tea! That I won’t have to share!

… stop by my regular grocery store to pick up some items on my list! And wander slowly through the aisles, contentedly humming along to the piped-in grocery store music! And I won’t buy goldfish! Or yogurt in a tube!

… go home, preheat the oven and make this chocolate cake! While listening to 80’s hits and dancing around the kitchen!

Smitten Kitchen's Everyday Chocolate Cake. This is her photo - isn't it gorgeous?! Click on the link to visit her site - it is one of the very best!

Smitten Kitchen’s Everyday Chocolate Cake. This is her photo – isn’t it gorgeous?! Click on the link to visit her site – it is one of the very best!

… clear some toys from the toy room while the cake is baking!  Finally get around to moving the toys we are keeping into the newly-finished basement!  Prep some toys for donation! Good deeds! Tax write-offs! Less legos to step on!

… clear some of the 5,000 photos (I’m not joking) off of my phone!  Back everything up to the Cloud, my laptop, and my external drive!  Add photos to my family photo share site!

… figure out my Amazon Fire TV stick!

… unpack my suitcase from my Midwest trip! Do a load of cold delicates that is just mine!

… go out and get a steak or something decadent, and sit alone, sipping a cocktail (or two!) and reading!  No picking up pieces of cold, slimy mac & cheese off of the floor when I’m done! No rushing through dinner! No asking for the check when I order the entree!

Yes, please.

Yes, please.

… put on my PJs and watch a movie of my choosing, with an R rating, from the seat of my choosing, on my own couch! While eating cake!

… sleep a glorious 8 hours! Wake slowly! Drink an entire cup of coffee while it it still hot! Take a walk then a long shower using all the hot water I want! Eat a piece of chocolate cake for breakfast! No need to set a good example!

… swing by the farmer’s market for raspberries! And tomatoes! And veggies! And anything else that strikes my fancy!

… pack my bag for the journey up to Maine! Listen to podcasts on the way! Stop at my favorite outlet in Kittery! Make it up to see the kids at lunch, feeling fulfilled and refreshed!

THE REALITY:

I will go home, put on my PJs, and order Thai take out.

I will then realize I have to get dressed to get the Thai food, throw on a sweatshirt (in July), and hope I don’t run into anyone I know who is out and being social and fun on a Friday night.

On the way out, I will realize we are out of cat food but skip the grocery store, lest I run into one of those social, fun, productive acquaintances. This means I will have to listen to the cat loudly lament the terribleness that is dry food (disgusting death nuggets, stupid human!) for the rest of the evening.

I will half watch The Great British Bake Off (go Ian!) while playing Plants v. Zombies until my eyelids droop at 9pm.

I will wake up to pee twice, and to a meowing cat three times.  And I will wake up three more times for no good reason, other than that I’m really used to sleeping next to my husband.

I will leave early to go to Maine, because I’m inexplicably up at 5:30am and have no coffee or half and half in the house, because I anti-socially skipped the grocery store.

And I’ll drive straight through, because I should.  And because Maine is awesome.  And so are my kids and my husband.

And lobster.

 

A Monkey! A Monkey! My Kingdom for a Monkey!

BOOM! Yes, I did just make a Richard III reference in my title.  Poor guy, they just found him under a car park. How does a king end up under a car park? 

Anyway…

Recently, a friend sent a link to this blog post: “Searching for The Glow Stick” by Jason Good.  It made me chuckle, since we struggle mightily with those toy pieces strewn about the house (*clears throat* the train table he got for Christmas? The track stayed assembled for 2 days and was then destroyed in Godzilla-like fashion by Plum the Destroyer).   And we know all too well the various items Pickle MUST HAVE in his bed before he can even consider going to sleep.  Because after a while (who am I kidding – after 8:30pm!) it just isn’t worth arguing about anymore.

Items in Pickle’s twin bed include:

1. Pickle
Chillaxin'

2. Twin-sized comforter

3. Twin-sized down comforter (or King-sized, depending upon whether there has been a recent Pull-Up breach)

4. Crib-sized, double thickness fleece blanket

5. Frog Pillow Pet (that he adores; this thing does not wash well, ew)
Stinky Frog Pillow

6. Alfie (18″ teddy bear)

7. Cubby (30″ teddy bear – Cubby is soft and huge)

8. Baby Bear (10″ adorable Steiff he got when he was born)
Baby Bear

9. Monkey Head Blanket #1 (he loves these things.  Seriously, we have 6 of them.  As back up.  Because we need nearly $100 of tiny stuffed monkey head blankets.  Parenthood makes you do crazy things.)
My Kingdom for a Monkey

10. Monkey Head Blanket #2 (just in case)

11. Sippy cup halfway full of water (it is not full, because we are trying to avoid middle-of-the-night Pull-Up breaches)

12. Large, yellow Mercedes Matchbox

13. Large, blue BMW Matchbox

14. Small, red Ferrari Matchbox

15. Flashlight that looks like a bug and whose batteries last forever
Lightening Bee?

16. 3 books (these vary night by night)

He has two, child-sized pillows as well, but one month ago, these fell off the bed and onto the floor on the side of the bed that is hard to reach so there they stay.  On occasion his bed also contains a noise-making tanker truck and this musical bus toy he got for Christmas.
Beep Beep Bus!

I suspect pretty soon he’ll be asking to sleep in our bed, because there simply isn’t any room left in his.

So tell me, what is the strangest bedfellow your little one has insisted upon?